Appointments, dance class, soccer practice, games, birthdays, anniversaries, meetings…

Who needs to be where when?

It can get a little overwhelming at times.

I rely on my Microsoft Office calendar and task manager to keep me straight and to remind me what I need to do, but this often isn’t enough for the whole family. They can’t see my computer files and in most cases, every member of the family needs to see what’s going on.

My method for solving this problem is a big ol’ wall calendar in a central location where everyone can see it. Everything that anyone has to do or pay attention to is written on this calendar.

A great way to keep it organized, visually appealing and quick to spot the details, is to color code the calendar. I use several different color pens to identify different things.

Birthdays and anniversaries are written in red. My husband’s appointments are written in navy blue, mine in purple, my daughter’s in pink (of course) and my son’s in teal. Events that the whole family participate in are in green. Vet appointments for the cats are in black. That way each member of the family can quickly see which items pertain to them without reading through a lot more information. It also saves space on the calendar because we don’t have to write the names down too.

What tips do you have for keeping your calendar functional? How do you keep track of it all?

Are you suffering from mom burn out? Do you struggle just to make it through each day? Moms everywhere are breaking down because they are too chicken to say, “No.”

“No” may be a tiny, two-letter word, but it can be your secret weapon. And you can say it. Here are some ways you can say “no” without feeling guilty about it:

Sorry, I’m taking a break.

The number one reason why you should say, “no” occasionally is simply that you deserve a break. You are chef, chauffeur, dish washer, and more. You job never ends on any given day of the week. You deserve a break. If you feel bad for saying “no,” say, “Sorry, I’m taking a break.”

My schedule is full.

We tend to jam-pack our schedule full of activities, leaving time for nothing. Cut back on your kids activities. Start a car pool and share driving responsibilities. Do whatever you can to free up some time in your schedule.

I don’t have time.

You’re headed out the door, rushing to the next appointment when the telephone rings. What do you do? Do you come to a screeching halt and answer the phone? Let’s say you do, and it’s a family member, calling to dump their latest woes on you. Do you stand, tapping your foot impatiently while you roll your eyes and listen to the sob story? This is a typical scene for many moms.

I have another commitment that day.

Say it and mean it. Regularly schedule in time with your family or time alone and if someone ask for your help during that time look in your planner and tell them you have another commitment.

Instead of rushing to be everything to everyone, stop. Ask yourself if you truly have time for whatever comes up. If not, say no by walking away, turning off the ringer on the phone, or not answering the knock at your door.

Always remember that you are a mom—not a super hero. When you have to say no, people will understand; if they don’t at first, they will get used to it eventually.

For more suggestions on living the life that you want to live visit Journey to Joy  (it is loaded with examples and action steps)

Two school supply lists and an hour later… I’m done with our school supply shopping.  Yep, all of it, in one afternoon.  And I’m not the stressed out mess I usually am after the adventure either. 

How did that happen?

I hit the store on the first day of the sale and more importantly, I went with a friend.  We tag-teamed the process.  It felt more like a scavenger hunt than a required chore.  It was almost fun. 

“I need two 24 packs of Crayola Crayons.  How many do you need?”

“Can you grab me a roll of paper towels and a box of zip-lock freezer bags while you’re over there?  Thanks.”

Then we stood at side-by-side checkouts chatting while we unloaded.  Four large bags of school supplies: $33.38.  Bonding with friends while doing getting it done.  Priceless!

Do you ever sit back at the end of the day and feel like you got absolutely nothing accomplished?  Do your to-do lists seem to go unchanged for days at a time?  Man!  I hate when that happens!  It seems to be happening to me an awful lot lately.  I thought that it was because my kids are home from school for the summer.

My husband, being the wonderful and supportive guy that he is, reminded me that I actually get a ton done during the day.  He often tells me that he doesn’t know how I do it all.  I just look at him like he’s on drugs because I don’t see whatever it is that he sees.  Alright…  enough bragging about my husband… that wasn’t my point…

There are even days that I give myself a hard time about writing on the subject of “life balance for the work at home mom.”  Yea, I know how its supposed to work and I’ve actually been able to accomplish this miracle once or twice in the past, but in reality I’m just as disheveled as the next mom. 

So, I have these to-do lists and they aren’t helping me so much.  Why?  In order to research that question, I started writing down stuff next to my to-do list that I actually did during the day.  An amazing thing started to happen.  I began to realize how much I actually was getting done.  It wasn’t the stuff on my to-do lists that I still needed to do, but at least it gave me back my feeling of accomplishment. 

I wasn’t giving myself credit for all the time I spent on things that didn’t have a visible result.  Getting the dishes done or putting away laundry had a visible result.  I knew I had accomplished something.  Creating a web page or a banner, sending an invoice, receiving a payment… all tangible results.  What I kept forgetting to see was the hours I was spending following up on healthcare benefits, doing free website consultations, negotiating home financial issues, networking, etc.   How empowering! 

Now my to-do lists have two columns.  The left column is the actual daily to-do list.  The right column is the got-done list.  For example:

I still have to get my priorities in order and start doing what I scheduled to get done, but at least now I feel a lot better about my day!  Look at this… I’m even more balanced than I realize. 

Give this a try.  Let me know how it works for you.