WAHM Depression: A Reality Check
The best laid plans sometimes fail. Or do they?
When my daughter started Kindergarten in August, I had planned on taking a week off for personal reflection and rejuvenation. I was going to recharge my batteries and jump into my website work and household management with gusto. That didn’t happen.
I found myself with all this “free” time on my hands and just kindof went crazy. I slept late, a lot. I wasted time browsing around the internet, a lot. I went out, a lot. All of a sudden being home completely alone didn’t seem like such a wonderful idea. I felt isolated. So, when friends said “let’s go”, I went.
Once I finally had time to figure out what I wanted to do and how I was going to do it, I couldn’t do it. I have been so busy taking care of everyone else for so long that I didn’t know who I was any more let alone what I wanted to do now that I was grown up. Having my children at home was a really good excuse to hold me back, but my excuse was pretty much gone.
Best laid plans? WHAT plans? I hadn’t really made any plans. I was floundering. I was (am) depressed.
Looking back at the past few months I realize that I have accomplished nothing. Nada. Zip. Zilch. (Okay, I may be being a little too hard on myself here.) Instead of picking up business and getting my house in order, it’s worse than it has ever been. I was suffering. My family was suffering. Our finances were suffering. I even considered going out and getting a job! GASP!
What frustrates me the most is that I know better. The whole concept between this blog and my website is about how to balance so THIS doesn’t happen. But I guess there is my reality check. It does happen. It happens to the best of us.
So, what am I going to do about it? I am going to continue to see the therapist that I began seeing a few months ago and I’m going to start following my own advice. I’m going to go back to the basics. I am going to re-read my 5 part email series on How to Achieve Life Balance. (Look for the purple subscription box and join me!) I am going back to scheduling work hours, setting daily goals, and holding myself accountable.
Again, I invite you to join me. Accountability works so much better when you share it with others.
December 30th, 2007 at 9:58 am
Hi, KC
Keep taking care of you, my friend.
Yep, it happens to the best of us. I can so relate. I want to say congratulations are in order for you! I like how you’ve made yourself accountable. I’m joining you in holding myself accountable as well, as there are some changes I want to make as well.
January 9th, 2008 at 2:50 pm
I remember having such freedom when my third started school, that I really wasted a lot of time. I mean, I had been parenting for 11 years without a break! Unfortunately, I created some very bad work habits, so it has taken time to get back to where I once was.
Only a few months for you? Not too long to run back and correct it - LOL!